My Skin Can't Be in the Game
I had no conception of wealth before coming to Yale. I considered myself upper middle class in my small Southern city. I never saw myself as in-need until I started applying to colleges, where money became a deciding factor in where to apply and attend. After learning of my financial aid package, my mom called the financial aid office, who told her, "if you are worried about paying for college right now, you should send your daughter to another school." I ended up here because it was the best school for me, but I learned that I was no longer "upper middle class."
When I arrived, looking for a job was one of my first priorities. I have scholarships from high school that cover my student income contribution, but I knew that any money I needed on campus for books, socializing,food and transportation would be money I would need to earn. Every week, I commit at least 12 hours to a blue collar job: I don't work a white collar job because I needed to find a job right away and didn't have the luxury of waiting for a better opportunity that would give me relevant job experience or connections. I know that I would participate in more on campus given those 12 hours per week back, but I need to earn the money to live.
It seems that the time wealth disparities are most visible is over breaks. I absolutely need to work somewhere over the summer. Last summer, I took a great opportunity to study abroad in Spain, but came back to campus financially hobbled. I couldn't afford my books and couldn't work enough hours quickly enough to pay for them. It is a great thing that Yale has all these summer opportunities for students, but only those that can afford not to earn money over the summer can partake without causing massive headaches.
Many of my friends come from similar financial backgrounds as me, so frequently I can slip into thinking that everyone works as hard to stay afloat here. Then, occasionally, I enter much wealthier spaces and am instantly shocked by the financially stressless lives other students live. My successes come despite challenges: needing to work, lack of networked connections, financial strain. I understood leaving high school that my life would be about overcoming obstacles and becoming stronger because of them. I thought this would be a universal experience among my classmates, but Yale has shown me that my struggles and my challenges are no where near universal, and the time I spend growing "stronger" is the time others spend getting ahead. My skin can't be in the game.
When I arrived, looking for a job was one of my first priorities. I have scholarships from high school that cover my student income contribution, but I knew that any money I needed on campus for books, socializing,food and transportation would be money I would need to earn. Every week, I commit at least 12 hours to a blue collar job: I don't work a white collar job because I needed to find a job right away and didn't have the luxury of waiting for a better opportunity that would give me relevant job experience or connections. I know that I would participate in more on campus given those 12 hours per week back, but I need to earn the money to live.
It seems that the time wealth disparities are most visible is over breaks. I absolutely need to work somewhere over the summer. Last summer, I took a great opportunity to study abroad in Spain, but came back to campus financially hobbled. I couldn't afford my books and couldn't work enough hours quickly enough to pay for them. It is a great thing that Yale has all these summer opportunities for students, but only those that can afford not to earn money over the summer can partake without causing massive headaches.
Many of my friends come from similar financial backgrounds as me, so frequently I can slip into thinking that everyone works as hard to stay afloat here. Then, occasionally, I enter much wealthier spaces and am instantly shocked by the financially stressless lives other students live. My successes come despite challenges: needing to work, lack of networked connections, financial strain. I understood leaving high school that my life would be about overcoming obstacles and becoming stronger because of them. I thought this would be a universal experience among my classmates, but Yale has shown me that my struggles and my challenges are no where near universal, and the time I spend growing "stronger" is the time others spend getting ahead. My skin can't be in the game.
